Getting More Out of Life Without Feeling Guilty About It

Have you ever felt like there’s GOT to be more to life than what you’re living right now? And you can’t help but watch that clock tick, those calendar pages turn over, wondering when it is that you are going to start getting more out of life? Taking this already successful life that you have and upgrading it? Turning it into the life that you’ve always dreamed of having?

But, when you have these thoughts, do you also have those little voices in your head saying things like:

But I already have a pretty sweet life. Why should I expect more?

Shouldn't I be happy with what I’ve got?

Who am I to want more out of life? I already have a good job or career or business. I have a good family, a nice house. I get to go on vacation every year. I’m pretty healthy. I have so much more than other people.

I have enough, it’s greedy for me to want more.

Or do you have other people in your life telling you that you have enough, or even more than your share. Maybe they aren’t saying it out loud, but implying it. That you have enough money, that you already have a good life, that you shouldn’t expect to ‘have it all’. That you’re even being greedy or ungrateful for what you already have.

I’ve been there. I’ve had all of those feelings, and I’ve even had my fair share of comments

The comments were never meant to be malicious (at least I don’t think they were). But when I voiced that I was looking for more in life, I often got raised eyebrows.

Like when I take solo trips, one of my favourite things to do, something that rejuvenates me and fulfills my need for adventure and independence, I get comments like:

• What about your husband, doesn’t it bother him that you go off on your own like that?
• What about your kids, don’t you feel guilty leaving them behind?
• Don’t you feel bad spending money on just yourself?

(Answers: no, no, and no)

Or when I’ve talked about shutting down my successful but unfulfilling business I got comments like:

• Well at least you work for yourself, you have flexibility, you get to choose your hours and your clients, isn’t that enough?
• You built what you have, and now you want more?
• Aren’t you afraid that you’re turning your back on a good thing?

(Answers: nope, yep, and sure am!)

And especially, when people would say: what more could you ask for?

Well, I could ask for much more:

• I want a business that lights me up every day
• I want to work primarily with women (my last business was in a male dominated industry) who are working towards their dreams
• I want a business that is location independent - not only so that it allows me to travel and see the world, but it also allows me to take care of my aging parents when they need me (since they don’t live in the same city as me)
• I want a business that has an impact - not just on my life but on my community, on the world!

Does any of this resonate?

If you are having these same feelings, like you want more out of your life but you are also feeling some guilt or even shame around it, there are four things I want you to know and consider:

First - you are not alone.

I hear SO many women talk about this. They know that they have a good life. But it may not be the life they are destined to have. Women around the world give so much to be good wives, good moms, good workers, good daughters. We are the caretakers, the nurturers. It’s not unusual to hear from women that their dreams have been chipped away, one at a time, until most of those dreams are a distant memory. I don’t want you to feel like you are the only one feeling this way.

Second - you can reclaim your dreams or even make new ones if your old ones no longer light you up.

Either way, you get to not only dream but make those dreams come true. This is your time! You don’t need to settle for ‘good enough’ anymore. You deserve the life you were destined to live.

Is it possible? Hell, yeah.

Will it be easy? Probably not.

Are you worth the effort? Absolutely.

Third - you can be grateful for what you have right now and still want more.

I am so grateful for what I have.

A beautiful house, an amazing family, a small group of fabulous friends, a supportive community of female entrepreneurs, a business that I built from the ground up that supported my family for nearly a decade.

And saying that I want more doesn’t mean that I’m rejecting it, just tossing it all aside like it doesn’t matter.

I might be giving up my old business for a new one, but I’m taking everything that I’ve learned from the old business to the new one. And maybe we’re considering a move, but I’ll always love this house that I raised my family in. Even if I’m ready to move on I’m so grateful for the journey that brought me to where I am today.

Four - Wanting more isn’t about being greedy.

It doesn’t have to be about wanting more stuff, or wanting more than your share. It’s about living a fuller life. It’s about having more impact, it’s about being more fulfilled, it’s about doing work that lifts you up, it’s about having more adventures, having more joy in your life.

It’s not about greed, it’s about expansion.

You get to decide what your definition of more is.

Does this help you release the guilt around wanting more in life?

It’s okay to recognize that your successful life doesn’t fulfill you, has not provided you with the life you know is waiting for you. It’s okay to say reach for more, to not settle for ‘good enough. You deserve more, you deserve to get more out of life, and feel completely guilt free about it.